Friday, January 17, 2014

Set Your Watches

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Set Your Watches
Inspired by Maira Kalman’s painting, “The Sun Will Explode.”



Set Your Watches.

Unless you are Jesus, your father makes love to your mother
So that his infinite spermatozoa penetrates her
                    finite ovum.
You are a zygote.
You are a fetus.
You are an infant             unborn.

She requestsDEMANDS pineapple AWHOLEPINEAPPLERINDLEAFANDALL IDON’TCAREIF IT IS 11PM TOHELLWITHYOURBOWLINGGAMERUSSELL!
PINEAPPLE!                                                                                                            NOW!

You are born one sticky greengold hour, hospital windows glaring “Glory Hallelujah” on a secular child.

Set Your Watches.

Your father and mother Kodachrome, Kodak, and Polaroid your
plush chubs; cartoon boom boone on pots, pans, boxes
you find more pleasurable than the toys once housed within. 
You play for hours in quiet steel dark.

You and your sibling get along well. ENOUGH! Well enough for
pillowforts, tears, giggles, backtickles, picturekisses, warnings
            and punches.

Your first death began your rites of passage
Your                                                 rites of spring ing            into A-Ha Youth.
He is a good boy.
He is a mutt whose make you cannot now quite recall. Lab? Terrier?
You weep in your father’s lap, holding as tears tear out. Finally:
almost a man.

Set Your Watches.

Your first kiss is a summertime monument of naïveté and hormones. She likes your Barney The Purple Dinosaur tshirt. Where he is eating children surrounding.
You ask politely. She nods. You taste
Lust, love, butterfly tummy flutters, and her Capri-Sun tongue discovered.
You say the words “I love you” in the dining hall after 2 days.
Your miscellaneous memory making moments memorialize the truth and beauty of your First You, the You you Now Know and call your Own.
“To Be Alive” and glowinthedarkstars pinned on your hoodie’s arm mean something to you.
You experience experiences stretched between stupid youth and graceful independence, riding your bike in the middle of midnight, middle of the street.
You sneak out over wet leaves like plopdown stars and nod a solace that you did You right.

Your first depression. Sadness. Blue. Heartache. Malaise. Ennui….

Whatever.

Whatever you call it, y-you do not care. The only peace you find is in playing one song you play one. two. three. four. five. six. seven. eight. nine. ten. eleven. twelve. thirteen. times in a row, then sleep.
                                                sleeep.
                                                                                    sleeeee.

Set Your Watches.

Still feeling 17, feeling print not script, feeling bumblebee dance and swerve, feeling alone and facing a wrong way, maybe; it may be that you are eventually, finally, unfortunately, gleefully                                                                                    an adult.

You are not yet ready to just call them once a week from a tattoo without tasting their cooking. Nor now yet ready to see friends rare, rarely, rarer.
See friends now not.
Friends now not see.
Now see friends not.
Not now see friends.
Never.

And you do not know any answers to every question
about legacy and taxes and selfishness and smiles and smiling and the death of you
and the death of Earth and the death of Sun and the death of the depth of your sadness, while you shuffle—off.
You instead take pieces of peace parsed by stars unseen and omnipresent illumine.
You know that you live each fivebillionth of each second with breath refreshing and
grins galoring before                        setting your watch.

Set Your Watches, mindful of the now no more time.

Set Your Watches.